Mizzriz Strabizmiz

My first grade teacher was a strange little creature

Miz Strabizmiz was her name

The most unusual feature about this grade school preacher

Was her eyes were not the same.

One looked right with the other out of sight

Sometimes spinning round and round

She caused a fright; you’d guess she might,

When glancing all around.

We never got away with illicit play

When Miz Strabizmiz watched the bounds

We tried our way but she always had her say

‘Cause she saw the whole school grounds!

A fine old girl, despite eyes aswirl

None better could be found

She adored the girls; their pretty little curls

The boys she loved to have around.

She taught me lots; aye, all us tots

Learned much from what she said

Yes, all I’ve got is based on what

She pounded in my head.

I think she’s gone; she wasn’t very strong,

On up in years back then

But I’d be wrong if I said her song

Hadn’t led me where I’ve been.

So now I must treat her memory just

Teach others what she knew

For if I was to let her theories rust

She’d cast eyes down on you know who.

TC, 1985

The Human Race

The Human Race we’re a strange lot

Doing things, pretending we’ll never get caught

Smoking dope and drinking beer

“We’ll never have any trouble here”

Sucking cigs and slugging whiskey

All these things and some more risky

Yes, we think we’ll beat the odds

Live forever; converse with gods

But flesh and blood, they do not last

All must one day surely pass

Things we thought would never come

Will visit us; yes everyone.

TC

Sheer Fear

Well you bit the bullet on this one Bucko

You finally tipped your hand

The snow is flying, you’re probably dying

And there’s no place to stop or land

 

Fifty or better straight down the hill

Head over heels and then

A mogul goes crack, so does your back

Say goodbye this is the end

 

But wait, there’s more, not like before

This ride has more misery to send

There’s 500 feet left to repeat

All the humps and dips you’ve been in

 

Cold hard ice exacts a large price

It pounds and bruises within

Makes you aware that any who dare

Can start here to pay for their sins.

TC